Weight loss…erghhh.. something which is on my list since I am born- haha just kidding. By the way a fun fact: when I was born, I was underweight, haha and the doctor said I was nutrition deficient. Lol. Even I don’t believe that now :P
But no, seriously, weight loss is something I am hearing and have been working on and off since the day I have come into my senses. Yeah, that is absolutely true.
As many of you already know, I have always been on the heavier side of my weight. Always.
I don’t remember the time when I was slim, ever. I never was. Every time, when I had to go for shopping (specially on birthdays when my parents wanted to me to buy some new clothes), I used to get goosebumps because the process of constant changing from one dress to another in the trial room for the obvious fitting issues and feeling ashamed about it, always made me feel so inferior, low and sad about myself. Though, at that young age, I used to forget about it as soon as I came out of the shops. :P but it was disheartening every single time.
Also, just like many of you, I too have an amazing set of relatives who whenever used to visit us for any family get together (especially during the holiday season), always used to just talk about me and my weight. I have a memory of many such weird incidences but one I still completely remember when I was just 12-13 years old and an aunt commented- “hey bhagwan- ye ladki kitni moti ho gai hai. Beta kuch krti kyun nhi ho? Aisa hi rha toh shaadi kaun krega tumse?”…huussshhh. These comments started breaking my heart one after the other.
Today, when I look back, I have no idea why she said that nor does it affect me in any way but at that point of time, those statements used to put a lot of pressure on me to do something. To do things unwillingly because I was happy and content with myself, but the society does not let that happen. I started feeling bad about myself not because of my body type but because of how people used to comment every time.
During summer holidays, I was asked to get up in the morning and go for running or cycling. (I have the best mother and father who used to encourage me to get fit but they never forced me to do any such thing which I don’t like but you know- people...!!)
I never enjoyed that. Never (and I will come to its reason in the blogs to come). I never liked any of that. I used to enjoy playing outdoor games but at the same time, being a Punjabi I have always had a love for food. And not only food- heavy and calorie-dense food. From chhole bhature to aloo k pranthe, from bread pakodas to chowmein and momos, I used to love all of it. Even in those difficult emotional moments, food was always a feel good factor. (I’m sure the case is similar to many of you but don’t worry, I will be talking about everything related to this). Moreover, I would not deny the fact that I have eaten all of that for a very long period of my life. And so was one of the main reason of my body shape.
So, yeah that’s how my childhood was. (relatable? it’s fine, it does not matter at all now).
I was a fat geek chashmish ladki. But I never had any problem with that. Only my relatives and the society had. So, the journey began a few years back. Precisely almost 12 years back. After I completed my 12th, I was on a one-year break as I was preparing for my engineering exams. I used to go for my classes till mid-afternoon and mostly had free time in the evenings. One day, my brother asked me to join a gym for aerobics classes. I had no reason to say no so I said yes to it.
The first day ever gave me a reality check. It was after a very long time when I stepped on a weighing machine. I was horrified. I weighed 81 kg. It was huge for me. I always knew I was not one of those slim girls, but I didn’t know I was that fat. I had tears in my eyes. When my aerobics instructor asked me to do only 10 front stretching (simple toe touching), I tried but vomited. I was absolutely low on strength because I had never done any of that in my entire life. I came back home and cried my heart out. I was a little girl and didn’t know what to do. I had the regular thoughts just like all other people that only I was this fat and nothing could ever change that. I suddenly started feeling pathetic about myself. I didn’t know whether I will be able to ever do aerobics or not. It took me a while to accept the fact that only hard work can make me better. But I collected the broken pieces of myself and continued going for the classes. It was tough in the beginning, but I never gave up. I started slow but continued. Because as we all know- ‘consistency is the key’.
Hahaha- within a month I saw results. I reached 77kg. It was such a big achievement. I still remember that feeling. I don’t feel that happy even today. So, my motivation level went super high and I used to do my workout to the best of my abilities. Since, it was baby fat and I was working out for the first time, the results started coming very quickly. I lost tremendous amount of weight. Within 6 months I reached 63 kg. 18 kg in 6 months. Wow. That was fantastic. I lost 18 kg. I had given up on my junk food (with the thought that once I get rid of this excess weight, I can have that again). I used to eat simple ghar ka khana- all three meals a day. But was waiting desperately to eat my comfort food once again. All I could see was a new me. I had a new confidence about myself. And then I started with my college days.
That’s how I started with me journey; little did I know at that time that it is a life-long process. I wish I had known at that time.
Also, remember calories dense food was still my love.
Want to know what happened next? More on the journey in the upcoming blogs.
Stay tuned and keep reading.
And and and- do you have a similar story? How do you feel after reading this? Do share your views in the comment section below.